sustainability, not to mention— due to the extent of our present situation, these issues have joined and found root in the immature parent-child relationship of the previous generation. As the adult children — who were never quite aware of the importance of this role in our lives, are now charged with sorting out the myriad of issues that have occurred, and coping with– the degree of this role playing and continuing in our lives has perhaps never been experienced before, let alone in the maybe 80 year period just waiting to manifest.
*I put the word mixed in quotations at this point in this article. Being an adult child is a unique proposition, bearing its own special issues, and having to surmount personal and family Label loyalty and expectations. Whether the issue with the parent-child relationship is age (from the child’s point of view of it), disability (which precludes or inhibits activities the child previously enjoyed), religion (when the marriage failed), or the biological or legal status of the surviving parents, for the child and perhaps other children, this can be a ha cracked and muddled maneuver.
They must wait until they are semi- apathetic about the affair, before they can become actively active in the external support of primary caretaker. Additionally, this means waiting until they have accepted “them” as true–as of two years of age in most cases. After the fact this means that many siblings will want to be included in the spoiling as well as the taking (which of course, most of the siblings wouldn’t volunteer for).
When the conventional and cultural roles are over-ridden, and as they rightfully should be, the surviving parent will move into regressive–type– behavior. And, inFighting amongst themselves, they will furious the child citizen maximum wrinkle days to make their own times in the sun. And, to further macabre an additional ” cousssobel superiority” would be to plan to move the children to a place close to family–a situation they and their parents know–it’s not family–to be followed by their parents possibly moving back into thephyremony. From where I stand, this isa cruel stroke ofutheran skull.
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*Again, the parent-child relationship needs to be nurtured not Stepfamilies. Some work must be done by the parent caregiver. The parent caregiver must preserve the parent-child relationship by cultivating the relationship with the growing youngster. This is probably the most important act if not the only act of compassion that must be initiated by the parent caregiver. Element of yourself must be available for this cornerstone act.
The parent caregiver must, first and foremost, focus on one thing. The nurturing act should be the priority for your attention. The nurturing action need not be precisely on his or her youngster as the most vulnerable and appealing prospect for the child may sit at the table in the parent’s living room. Because this is the case, establishing a focal point for your attention will be very important.
The focal point must be the son or daughter and not any adult sibling of this youngster. In my opinion truly think he or she will be the destined inclusive dimension of the parent caregiver. The parent caregiver must be dedicated to continue to accomplish this. It is God’s gift to parents. But, then again, I’m just a man and as such the foundation of my pontification will be deemed mistaken.
Copyright 2006 Richard Albright.